Yeah, the teenaged girl with the green eyes and great equipment I married 37 years ago is now 56 and a grandmother of three. Hey, I ain't no prize either - the Marine Corps won't even take me back as a target for the rifle range.

Anyway, the bride did a colonoscopy this morning and was done with it in less than an hour. I've had it done and it's a piece of cake. Yes, they found a couple of polyps in her colon but they find those in more than 95% of everybody that has the procedure done. And 99.9% of them are benign. The good news is that her colon and gaskets appear to be in good shape and she had no problem with a male doctor going up her old back porch to catch a clean bill of health with something that kills a lot of people - colorectal cancer.

Hey, I once had a good-looking lady doctor check out my manhood as part of a physical for a job. Another doctor treated her for a head wound after she collapsed to the tile floor with laughter.

Keep laughing and go get checked out if you have some miles on you. You have Obamacare coming and everybody with a dollar or two wants to help pay for it.

O'K Larry since you brought the subject up, I had one done too about a month ago. I had my first one done 10 years ago and swore I wouldn't have it done again. The new technology and better treatment now is amazing. It was done in the hospital and I was asleep during the whole proceedure, which took only 20 minutes. When they woke me up I didn't even know it was over. No pain or after effects. I had it done by a female doctor who specializes in these. She was reccomended by my doctor and nurses who I see regularly. I'm glad I had it done also. The worst part is the night before, you have to drink a gallon of Gatorade mixed with some sort of powder to clean out the system. If anyone has any questions just PM me and I'd be happy to talk about my experience.

Yup, Jack, the day before is the worst part of the deal as you clean out your digestive track but it's not bad.

For my first colonoscopy I sat on the bowl while drinking a gallon of stuff that didn't stop to say hello.

But the entire deal is painless and could save a lot of people who are "shy".

Jesus H. Christ, I knew about young Navy and Army female nurses tearing apart Marine trousers in order to stop bleeding and give guys a chance at life. Nobody should care about a doctor going up your back porch to make sure you're going to last another bunch of years.

In my early 40s I used to kneel down on a thing that made me think of going to Confession as a youngster but then the proctologist pushed a button and the next thing I knew I was upside down with my feet and white socks wiggling in the air. It's funny to think about but I don't suffer the horror of hemorrhoids anymore. Maybe my time in locker rooms, the service and the strip searches after getting arrested after drunken brawls as a young man had something to do with it but I don't think so.

You have to take care of yourself if you can. Everybody is going into the ground but it's OK to delay it if you can.